‘True Blood’ recap: Beyond Here Lies Nothin’

    Ding dong! The witch is dead!
     
    Usually we’re not violent people and we don’t rejoice at others’ suffering, but we couldn’t help but cheer when Maryann Forrester was finally destroyed in the season finale of “True Blood.”
     
    Maryann, a maenad, had been driving the town of Bon Temps, Louisiana, crazy in every sense since the season began.  Well, last night all the foolishness came to a head, but we’lll get to that in a minute.


     
    As it turns out the giant egg that Tara Thornton and Eggs were making a nest was actually an ostrich egg that’s supposed to be used as an offering. After all the unexpected surprises on this wonderfully bizarre show, that revelation was a bit of a let down. Thankfully it was the only one of the episode.
     
    The show opens with Lafayette Reynolds telling Tara and Eggs to take the offering down stars. Then he demands the still-petrified Sookie Stackhouse to change into a white gown. 
     
    While they’re playing dressup, Sookie’s brother Jason Stackhose and disgraced office Andy Bellefluer arrive at Maryann’s/Sookie’s still focused on saving the possessed townspeople.  That proves to be a short-lived plan as they too soon fall under Maryann’s spell, but we’re still not sure how it happened. Maybe crazy was just contagious for this episode.
     
    In another part of town Bill Compton finds Sam Merlotte and the two develop a plan to use his shape shifting to kill a maenad
     
    Back with Sookie, costume change complete, we find that she’s been wrangled into maid of honor duties for Maryann’s wedding/sacrifice.  And to add insult to injury, Maryann’s wearing Sookie’s grandmother’s bridal gown. The blushing bride insists that Sookie hit her with some of the power she used a few episodes back, but the problem is Sookie doesn’t know how to work it and she just ends up smacking Maryann.
     
    After a few gross pre-wedding tasks like licking the egg, the wedding is underway.  And about midway through the ceremony Bill interrupts the festivities to deliver the sacrificial offering: Sam. The bartender is seems resigned to his fate as he’s handed over to the groomsmen and tied to the giant meat statue that Maryann has been constructing.
     
    Sookie, furious at Bill for the betrayal, collapses into a heap when Eggs uses the ceremonial knife to stab Sam. While Maryann is anointing herself in Sam’s blood, Bill tells her to go listen to Sam, who through his thoughts tells her to destroy the altar he’s been strapped to and the ostrich egg.
     
    Although Sookie couldn’t tap into her power for Maryann she manages to use it in even greater force to knock over the statue and smash the egg, ruining the maenad’s ceremony.  And like any other centuries-old, evil, insane bridezilla, Maryann goes storming after Sookie.
     
    She chases the telepath into the forest, and when Sookie tripped (you knew it was going to happen) she’s got her right in her clutches. But at the last moment Sookie is saved as the horned god appears as a bull, making Maryann forget her bloodthirsty task just long enough to be gored.
     
    The maenad, now convinced that she’s the one who’s supposed to be sacrificed to the god, gleefully accepts her demise only to be unpleasantly surprised to find out that the bull was actually just a completely healed Sam (gotcha, b**ch!). Sam takes advantage of her shock to rip out her heart and crush it in his fist, instantly killing Maryann.
     
    Back at Sookie’s the people of Bon Temps have finally returned to their senses, and some of them awake to unsettling surprises. Eggs, for example, is traumatized to the site of blood all over his hands. As everyone is shuffling home, Tara does her best to comfort Eggs and convince him that he didn’t knowingly do anything wrong.
     
    Once Sookie is out all she wants Bill to do is just hold he.  It seems things between them are fine now that she realizes Bill wasn’t throwing Sam to the wolves.
     
    But what about Eric? Last we saw him, he was sauntering into the nest of Sophie-Ann the vampire queen. Well, it seems he’s missed all the fun since he’s been trapped in a game of Yahtzee. “We play to 5 million,” she tells him before explaining that what she told Bill about killing maenad may or may not be true. Luckily for Sookie and Co. it was.
     
    Sophie has a knack for dropping all kinds of great tidbits while playing Yahtzee, like the fact that she’s the one behind all the V dealing in Louisiana and she’s having Eric run the whole thing. We’ll assume that Eric had to stay the day too since we don’t hear too much out of him for the rest of the episode.
     

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