Can open relationships work?

    There are always rumors of celebrities who’ve agreed to have open marriages. Mo’Nique and hubby Sidney Hicks, Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith and Tiny and T.I. have all been rumored to spread the love outside of their holy unions.

    While many celebs, including “Basketball Wives: LA” star, Jackie Christie who’s been married for 16 years, denounce the practice, some, such as her “BBW: Miami” colleague, Evelyn Lozada, don’t seem so repulsed by the idea, but do open relationships work?

    Sister 2 Sister fans have made their opinions clear. In a recent poll about open marriages, a whopping 84 percent responded that “open marriages are a terrible idea that lead to divorce.” Fourteen percent believe “it can work if both parties are completely down for it.” While only 1 percent of the more than 3,000 users who participated in the survey said, “Do it!”

    It’s not a huge surprise that a mostly female audience would feel that way, so Sister 2 Sister turned to reality star and relationship guru Dr. Tiy-E to get a man’s perspective on the issue.

    He said, “There is nothing under the laws of marriage that permits such hypocrisy and foolishness. If you don’t feel the spiritual commitment to your mate, join a polygamist community and live happy every after.”

    However, Tiy-E didn’t completely condemn the open marriage thing, giving a bit of leeway to those religions that honor polygamist lifestyles.

    That’s the “only time open relationships should be deemed acceptable,” he said.

    It makes sense to oppose an open marriage if one person isn’t down with it, but if two consenting adults agree to let others into their bedroom, why is that an issue?

    “There are no pros only cons,” Tiy-E said. “The problem comes in with people not wanting to grow and accept discipline and sacrifice in their lives,” he said. “If your mate don’t desire a monogamous marriage, file for divorce immediately and bid farewell.”

    So, what’s that mean for couples like Evelyn and Chad who consider “loose“ arrangements that don’t require monogamy. Tiy-E suggested that in healthy marriages, spouses look to one another to fill those needs by being open and honest.

    “If we spent a little more time openly communicating about our wants and desires, we’ll have more successful marriages. Your mate can fulfill your fantasy 90 percent of the time if they know what it is and 0 percent if they don’t,” he advised.
     

    Follow Dr. Tiy-E @drtiye and at www.DrTiyE.com.

    —Tracy L. Scott

     

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