Abstinence has been a relatively easy decision for Evette Holyfield, who fully intends to wait until she’s married to have sex.
Evette is 27 years old, single and a virgin. And she’s completely okay with that. It was part of the value system that’s always been part of her life, and her dad Evander Holyfield made sure she understood the value of virginity at a young age.
"We grew up in a Christian home. When I was around six years old, my dad said to me, ‘You don’t need to have sex outside of marriage,’" she recalled. "He went through the whole spiel with me. So as I grew up, I thought, ‘Okay, dad, if you don’t want me to do it, I’m not gonna do it.’"
Maintaining that stance has come with getting deeper into her faith. "I started to really understand church—the words in the Bible and what the pastor is really saying," she explained to Essence. "At that point, I wasn’t just doing it because my dad said don’t, but rather, I now believe that by waiting, God will bless me and bring me a great husband.
In a time when talking about your latest escapes are part of the culture of girl talk, some women don’t get Evette’s decision to remain a virgin until she’s married. Aside from the spiritual benefit for her, she said she’d rather focus on keeping her goodies exclusive. She shared, "Some women have said to me, ‘Why would anyone want to date you if you haven’t had sex?’ I ask them, ‘Why would anyone want to date someone who has slept with the whole world?’”
While she has spoken with young girls about abstinence at different schools, she knows that her path is not for everyone. "I would prefer if women waited to have sex, but I know it’s unrealistic to think that all women are going to think like me," Evette admitted.
But if you really want some advice from Evette she has a couple of suggestions. "I think women should make a list of what they really want in a man. Then, wait, really stick to your guns, and have faith that God is going to give you that person," she advises. "If women did that, it would save them a lot of heartache. Never settle."
Evette revealed that she hasn’t really had any problems practicing what she preaches. It’s not clear whether she’s had any close calls, but being abstinent has supposedly been a breeze for her. Afterall, how can you miss something that you never had?
Honestly, it’s easy for me. I was in a three-year relationship, and I never had those desires for him in that way. He never pressured me," said Evette. "In my mind, I already have it set that I’m not gonna do it, so if someone were to pressure me, it wouldn’t even phase me. I just don’t have those desires."