A Jamie Foster Brown interview (excerpted from July 2009 issue of Sister 2 Sister magazine)
Hi gang, this is Jamie Brown at Neffe and Soullow’s new house in Atlanta, Georgia. S2S Marketing Consultant Terrance Pratt and I are excited to be here, but we were just kicked out of Frankie’s place. Well, actually we never got in her place. We went to interview her first, but she said she wasn’t gonna let nobody up in her crib. I happened to know she had been hanging out at a Keith Sweat party the night before and was probably exhausted. She was.
We left, but I was perturbed, so I went to Neffe’s house where Soullow cooked a great meal for us. You know he had been a chef at Applebee’s Restaurant, so he had gone out to purchase food and he slammed down for us. Neffe was all excited upstairs with makeup artist/family friend Dariel getting made up to be even more beautiful. The kids were amazing. Terrance was delighted that Neffe’s daughter Christaria (nickname “Star”) taught him how to braid hair so that he can braid his own daughter’s hair.
By the time we finished eating, dancing, talking and clowning, it was 11 p.m. We were tired, but by this time the little demon Frankie was awake and in full effect. She was calling and calling, saying that I had to come to her house. But I didn’t want to go back to her house that late. I wasn’t trying, but Manny called from overseas saying Frankie was begging him to get me to come to her house. We finally went. Read about how that went in Frankie’s interview. But meantime, enjoy Neffe and her family the way we did. Because it was the way we were.
Jamie: Look at my Neffe. Doesn’t she look wonderful? It took long enough!
Neffe: You don’t understand. I said if Jamie don’t come to my house and interview me, I was going to be mad at her. But she did, so I’m excited.
Jamie: I had to come and see my Neffe. [Talking about Neffe’s breasts] Where did those girls come from? We’re going to have another Jaylyn around here? [Jaylyn is Neffe’s youngest child]
Neffe: Absolutely not.
Jamie: No? You’re done?
Neffe: I don’t know.
Jamie: Soullow, what’s your real name? [Soullow is Neffe’s man.]
Jamie: How did you get the name “Soullow”?
Soullow: My mama.
Neffe: [Jamie points to the “Soullow” tattoo on Neffe’s forearm] Oh, this was, like, really spontaneous.
Jamie: Tell me about it.
Neffe:I got to Vegas and … you know what? I don’t even know why. It probably was the lovemaking the night before.
Jamie: The lovemaking was that good?
Neffe: Right. I think that’s what it was.
Jamie: What was different?
Neffe: It’s different when you have somebody that truly, truly, truly loves you versus somebody that says that.
Jamie: How do you know when somebody truly loves you?
Neffe: I’m not going to say that [my ex-husband] Clyde didn’t love me, because he did. But there’s a difference between being loved and being “in” love. And I did not learn that until I started loving myself because you cannot love or be in love with anybody if you don’t love this. And it took a lot. Like, he took me through a lot.
Jamie: Did you love yourself the last time I talked to you, a couple of years ago?
Neffe: No, I was loving that ex-husband of mine.
Jamie: You were crying because you were upset about him being with your cousin.
Neffe: Yeah, I was still struggling and battling with the fact that I had lost my husband to my cousin. But it took years to figure this out: I didn’t lose him to her, I gave him to her.
Jamie: How did you do that?
Neffe: Well, I must say, thinking that he loved me and thinking that giving him anything that he asked for would be okay. So basically, having a threesome and thinking that that’s what we were supposed to do. Absolutely not. That didn’t work out.
Jamie: Did he ask you to do that?
Neffe: He did, but at the same time, I came to him. Everybody experiments. Let’s try something new. But then, me being young and not really thinking that, okay, if he really loves you, he’ll look at you and say, “Well, I don’t want another man to touch you.” You know what I’m saying?
Jamie: These kids are gorgeous.
Neffe: Thank you. That’s Jamary. That’s my ex-husband’s son but I’ve been helping to raise him. And of course you know Breanna.
Jamie: I know, 11-year-old thing.
Neffe: Yes, aspiring actress, singer, dancer.
Jamie: Is she really?
Neffe: And Jaylyn WeLove Cole—he was a star before he came out of the womb. When you was interviewing me, I was pregnant with him. That’s not Clyde’s son. That’s Kevin’s son.
Jamie: How did you get with Kevin?
Neffe: Well, I had been knowing him for years-knowing him while I was married to Clyde. So he was a friend that I had worked with. Then me and Clyde was going through so many changes and differences, I ended up crossing them boundaries. In the midst of that, I ended up getting pregnant.
Jamie: Okay, are you still hurting behind your husband being with your cousin?
Neffe: Oh, no. That is so over.
Jamie: And were they really in love, or you don’t know?
Neffe: Like, two years ago, I was like, “You’re my husband; come home, please. Come to Georgia.” And he said that he was happy where he was.
Jamie: What are you talking about in your book?
Neffe: Oh, I’m talking about Neffe. This is when you would get a true glimpse of Ms. Neffe.
Check out the July 2009 issue of Sister 2 Sister magazine to find out the one thing Neffe is proud to say she never did.